It sounds like you have more than one legal issue with your husband. You may want to seek the advice of a family law attorney.
For your income taxes, you can only file a joint return if you and your spouse agree. If you can't agree, and if you are not separated, then you must file married filing separately.
Filing separately may actually be to your long-term benefit, because when you file a joint return you are agreeing to be jointly responsible for all of the income, all of the deductions, and all of the tax that is reported on the tax return. You are legally and jointly responsible for any errors or fraud. Given your husband's present behavior, it may be to your long term advantage to file separately and not share in the responsibility for whatever it is that he might be doing.
(Head of household is only allowed if the spouses have been separated for all of the last six months of the tax year, and the spouse who files as head of household must provide care in their home for at least one qualifying child dependent. If you were separated for all of the last six months of the tax year, and you also provide care in your home for a qualifying child dependent, then you also could file as head of household. If you were each using the same child dependent to qualify for head of household, the IRS would see the duplicate claim and start an investigation on which parent was actually entitled to claim the child.)
