You seem to be asking how to fill out your W-4 for your employer to tell the employer how much tax to withhold from your paychecks. The way you fill out your W-4 does not dictate how you file your tax return. They are two separate issues. A W-4 only goes to your employer---it does not go to the IRS. Filling out a W-4 is not "filing" a tax return.
https://turbotax.intuit.com/tax-tools/calculators/w4/
https://www.irs.gov/individuals/tax-withholding-estimator
https://www.irs.gov/pub/irs-pdf/fw4.pdf
As for how you actually file your tax return, if you are legally married with children, filing a joint return with your spouse is almost always the best way to file. That way you and your spouse get the higher standard deduction for a married couple and you are eligible for the child-related refundable credits like earned income credit, additional child tax credit, and you can get the childcare credit.
**Disclaimer: Every effort has been made to offer the most correct information possible. The poster disclaims any legal responsibility for the accuracy of the information that is contained in this post.**