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If you are a private person, not a corporation, you do not have to issue a 1099-MISC to anyone you might pay money to. Whether they report the income and pay taxes is up to them. (You may issue a 1099-MISC but you don't have to.)
Relatedly, you will need their SSN if you want to claim the dependent care credit for part of your childcare expenses. That will trigger the IRS to look for matching income from them. (If you don't have an SSN but still want to claim the credit, print your return, and on form 2441 where it asks for the provider tax number, write "refused" and attach a written statement that gives the provider's name and address, any other identification you can provide, and that explains that you attempted to obtain the SSN but the provider refused. This situation will block e-filing so you will have to print your return and mail it in.)
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