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Filing jointly with your spouse is not the same as filing Head of Household. Those are two different filing statuses. If you and your spouse lived together then file a joint return. Listing your name first on the return does not mean you are the "head of household."
Head of Household is a filing status for someone who is unmarried or considered unmarried because they have lived apart from their spouse for at least the last six months of the tax year, and are supporting the children.
Am I Head of Household?
https://ttlc.intuit.com/questions/1894553-do-i-qualify-for-head-of-household
As to changing your filing status after you e-filed--no. If you need to change your filing status after you e-filed, then you have to wait for your return to be fully processed and then amend it by preparing a Form 1040X which must be mailed to the IRS.
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