Yes, that is the window. Lower left box is checked. My advice is just leave the window open by doing nothing, and just let the “ checking for updates” continue ...
This solution was close enough that it worked to correct my issues. But there was another step I avoided, and I believe that helped as well. If during "checking...
I'm having the same issue, but while downloading the update, another message stops the progress "Developer Tools Access needs to take control of another process...