What can I do to reduce paying irs back so much next year. don't understand why I had such a large increase in the amount I had to pay this year compared to last year.

we can't see your return.  so this is a suggestion.   are you sure everything was correct on the 2019 return?  if so your choices are to increase withholding try 0 exemptions or pay estimated taxes.

the rules to avoid penalties (this just avoids penalties it does not mean you couldn't end up owing a substantial amount)     

1) estimates and withholding must equal or exceed 90% of current year tax or

2) current year taxes less withholding is less than $1000 or

3) estimates and withholding equal 100% of 2019 tax (110% if 2019 adjusted gross income is more than $150,000) 

If the total amount of itemized deductions is not greater than your standard deduction, charitable contributions will not lower your tax liability unless the additional charitable contributions raise your itemized deductions above your standard deduction. 

Basically, due to Trump Tax Cuts for the Uber-Rich, it is much more difficult for us peons to itemize now. That's how they want it.

Not enough, now on the second pass they eliminate the Stretch IRA.