Once the tax return has been filed the method for depositing a tax refund cannot be changed. If the bank rejected the direct deposit because your name was not on the account, then the bank would have sent the refund back to the IRS. The IRS will mail a refund check to the address that you entered on your tax return.
NO NO NO ... the IRS will deposit to any account that you specify however the bank that manages the debit card have the obligation to ensure your money goes to you and will reject the deposit if your name is NOT on the account. So they are the ones who will not allow the deposit not the IRS ... thus the refund will be returned to the IRS and the IRS will mail a paper check to the address on the tax return. This process can take several weeks to complete. What you should have done is bought a prepaid debit card of your own at the store for $5 and registered it to you so you can get an IRS deposit to your own card ... you cannot share a bank card.