We filed jointly last year & bank refused direct deposit of refund into spouses account because names had AND between them. How do I change that to OR this time?

I want to know where the control is to change a refund's recipients from AND to OR. My bank would not deposit the funds into my spouse's account without my name on it because the account is solely in her name. There is no place I've found to change this information so that either of us can take care of the refund. Last year was a nightmare trying to cash the check that eventually came (because the direct deposit was refused) - I was out of town for an extended trip and unable to be present when she cashed the refund check. This must be something we can change! Where is that found?