If she is not cooperating by providing her SSN, then you will need to print and mail your return with as much of her information as you have.
As to will they notify her? Probably. How soon? That would be hard to answer.
However, if you want to take the credit, you have no other option but to report what you paid to her and include her Name, Address, Phone Number (if you don't have her SSN)
If you do have her SSN, they probably won't "notify" her, but yes they would be expecting a tax return from her.
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