If the IRS is telling you they changed the amount claimed as a recovery rebate credit and your refund changed by $3,000 it sounds like you entered an incorrect amount or did not enter anything when asked how much you received in 2021.
You cannot claim a spouse as a dependent. You simply file a joint return which means you both report all of your information on that one return. If she did not have any income because she is disabled, you would have received a standard deduction of $25,5100 as married filing jointly instead of $12,550 if you would have filed as Married Filing Separately.
If you look at line 30 of your 1040 that you filed and it says $2,800, this is likely because you did not enter the amount you actually both did receive so the program then said since you didn't receive it yet, you can now get it. When the IRS saw this, they said, yes you did receive it so you cannot get it again and changed your numbers.
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