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After you file
Wait----was your 2019 return rejected or accepted? Did you e-file it? If the e-file was rejected then it was never filed at all. You do not amend a rejected return. Amending is only used as a way to correct a fully processed return that had mistakes. if the 2019 return was rejected then it was not filed at all, and now you could make those corrections (without clicking on anything that says "amend") and print, sign and mail it in.
If your 2019 return was accepted and you just did not receive your refund, that is a different issue. What does your account say for the 2019 return? Does it say "accepted" or "rejected?"
One more thing----just in case. If you are the custodial parent of the children and have lived apart from your spouse for at least the last six months of the tax year, then you can file as Head of Household for 2019 and 2020. If there are no children involved, then you should file married filing separately---not single. You will have to mail your 2019 return and mail your 2020 return and attach a note that says you cannot get the SSN of your spouse, since you are supposed to put a spouse's SSN on the return even when you file MFS.
If you and your spouse filed any past tax return married filing jointly using TurboTax then you may be able to find his SSN on a past return by accessing the old account. You can get a free transcript of a past return from the IRS but they only display the last four digits on the SSN on the transcript.
And....the EIP payments are really based on your 2020 tax return, so you can use the recovery rebate credit on your 2020 return to get those first two stimulus amounts. The 3rd one comes later, and in your case, you will likely need to get it on the 2021 return.