Retirement tax questions

Accepted means received for processing.  Approved is a later step.

https://www.irs.gov/refunds/tax-season-refund-frequently-asked-questions

deposited in my wife's checking account

Please check with her bank. They might not accept a deposit if both your names are listed on it.  If they refuse, it goes  back to the IRS, who then mails you a check in 2-4 weeks.