Here is one link. There are some posters indicating as you are. There is one, at the bottom, indicating the opposite, and that poster indicates he/she works in the HSA/FSA field. My employer is also telling me it cannot (should not) be done.
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https://money.stackexchange.com/questions/43089/wife-has-fsa-with-employer-and-my-new-employer-offer...>
