For the date of birth on a failed adoption, use an anticipated (approximate) date.
in order to claim the expenses for a failed adoption, one year must pass after the expenses are incurred, even if the child was not yet found. Since you have paid the expenses in 2019, you can claim them on your 2020 tax return.
You do not need a name for the child. Enter Unknown for the first and last name, and an [approximate] intended birth date. The software will not require an ITIN/SSN.
Here is IRS Topic No. 607, Adoption Credit
Please keep in mind, the credit applies to a US adoption.
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