The first thing you need to do is stop calling the IRS and get everything in writing instead.
Unfortunately, you should have responded in writing to the first IRS letter that you actually received. At this point, it may be taking a chance to respond to the Final Notice, in case you have another foul-up in the mail.
What you might do if you don't want to take a chance on replying by mail to the Final Notice, is to contact a local Enrolled Agent or CPA. An Enrolled Agent (EA) may be your best choice since they primarily deal with the IRS. The EA will possibly call the IRS and lean on someone or know how to write your response to put you in the best light.
To find a local EA, see this webpage.
In the meantime, write down everything you remember like the dates of the calls, what was said, etc.
As for Turbotax Audit Defense, I am not sure what their current services are, but it is worth a call.
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