According to the IRS:
- When you're a surviving spouse filing a joint return and a personal representative hasn't been appointed, you should sign the return and write "filing as surviving spouse" in the signature area below your signature.
- When you're a surviving spouse filing a joint return and a personal representative has been appointed, you and the personal representative should sign the return.
If I were faced with the situation you described, I would file as the surviving spouse. If her step-son were to resign, there would be no administrator.
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