It depends, but I would state that the amounts that the IRS suggests are probably off, especially if you are in higher tax brackets.
The withholding tables are designed so that if you have only one income in the household, you will have the right amount withheld for that income. The formula does work when there is only one income, but when the family is a double-earning family, it is easy to be under-withheld, and more so now that the Tax Cuts and Jobs Act has altered the standard deduction as well as the tax brackets. The effect is that each job is accounting for a standard deduction of $24,000, which means that you are being withheld, in effect, assuming a $48,000 deduction. That won't be enough tax withheld as you are probably guessing.
You sound like you don't have children (the formula is quite complicated with children), so I'd actually recommend withholding something like "married, but withhold at higher single rate", and perhaps 2 allowances. I think that will get you very close to your desired result, and if you want a bit more tax taken out, use the same status with 1 allowance each. This way, your combined income withholdings are accounting for the correct amount of deduction: $24,000 (12,000 each) and accounting for the correct tax brackets, instead of $48,000 and accounting for much lower brackets.
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