I would first ask the lender why the points are not included on the 1098 they sent you. If they can't explain why, or indicate it was an oversight on their part, then claiming those points should not be a problem provided you have evidence of having paid those points in 2020 on your closing documents.
As I understand it, if this was for your primary residence then the points are fully deductible in the tax year you paid them.
The 1098 says "points paid on purchase of principal residence" (box 6). You didn't buy your home, you refinanced.
Points paid on a refinance must be spread out over the life of the loan. For example, for a 30 year loan (360 payments), you deduct 12/360ths of the points if you made 12 payments, 9/360ths if you made 9 payments, and so on. When you pay off the loan, you can deduct the remaining points at that time, unless the reason you paid off the loan is that you refinanced again with the same lender. In that case, the remaining old points get added to the new points and the total amount is spread out over the life of the new loan.
If you used some of the refinance proceeds to make substantial improvements to your home, you can deduct that part of the points all at one, and spread the rest out. For example, if you refinanced for $200,000 and used $20,000 to remodel the kitchen, you could deduct 10% of the points all at once in the year of the refinance, and spread the rest out over the life of the loan.