Dependent care credit do i claim only amount i paid or total ex husband and i?

[xmasbaby0]

Only the custodial parent can get the childcare credit.   Are you the custodial parent?

Are you the custodial parent?  Do you have an agreement with the other parent to allow the other parent to claim them--due to divorce or that you live apart and share custody?  Did one of you sign a Form 8332?

If there is a signed 8332 then the custodial parent retains the right to file as Head of Household, get earned income credit and the childcare credit.  The non-custodial parent gets the child tax credit for children under the age of 17.

As far as the IRS is concerned, the custodial parent is the one with whom the child spent the most nights during the tax year--at least 183 nights.

[Opus 17]

If you are the custodial parent, only you can claim the credit, it can't be shared or transferred, even if you have a court order to allow your ex to claim the child tax credit.

You can only claim expenses that you actually paid.  In the future, if your ex helps pay expenses, it might be helpful for your ex to pay you, and then you pay the care provider.

Of course, the maximum care expense you can use for the credit is $3000 for one child and $6000 for 2 or more children, so if you paid (for example) $4000 each for the care of one child, you already paid more than half, so adding more would not change the credit.